Poop and Sucker Punches

I wasn't going to post again until I had something positive to say.

I would probably not post for a while.

That's my current state of mind anyway. Friday was crap. It was hell, actually. I picked up a kid who just went nuts and kicked and punched the teacher and was defiant. Today I picked up a kid who not only hit other kids and became defiant, but he actually punched SEVEN kids, one of whom he punched in the stomach, then, when she was down on the ground, sucker-punched her in the side of the head.

T is in full regression.

This, apparently, is normal for children adopted from foster care.

NORMAL?!?!

I felt like my soul died today when my phone rank and the vice principal was on the other line. The vice principal does not call when good things happen.

By the time I got down to the school, T was sitting by the teacher, not hurting anyone. I spoke with him, had some moments of tears for the both of us, then had a chat with the principal. Talk of making better choices ensued.

We returned to the class and T asked Mrs. D if he could rejoin the class. She declined.

That's when Mom (that would, in this situation unfortunately, be me) had to pull a screaming, stomping child out of the class. In the hallway he stomped. He put up his fists and screamed in my face. He told me NO over and over. He informed me that he was GOING to go back to class. So I calmly dragged him (I say drag, but he was actually walking, trying to get his hand out of mine, punctuating the air with frequent announcements of "no" as we went, stuck behind a slow-moving class of kinder and first graders) down the hallway and took him into the bathroom.

I informed him of how these are the kinds of behaviors that are causing the school to not want him there. This was something we had discussed at length when we had had previous, smaller incidents.

When he finally calmed down, I took him out, got the full story from the principal and the yard duty as he waited in the office, and took him out.

*****TANGENT: By the way, his pants were pooped. It seems that at lunch he was antsy, he went to the bathroom and an adult made him leave before he was done so he got crap on his underwear. That probably did not help calm him down. But I didn't discover this until we were at home, he was in time out, and I just happened to walk by. *****

Anyway, after picking him up it got interesting. I got a call from Daddy B that he was on his way. I happened to bump into some moms I have just barely started chatting with. I mentioned that someone had suggested therapy. One said totally YES, one said absolutely NOT. The first is speaking from the perspective of the mom of a bullied child. The second is speaking from the perspective of a mom of a child with some anger issues. Very, very interesting.

So I have a tough decision in front of me. Tomorrow T has a pulmonology appointment in the morning. Then I am taking him BACK to school, even though I hasn't planned on it. I will be going with him. I will be going with him every single day of school for last weeks of school. I will shadow him and get him through this regression as best I can. On Saturday there is a t-ball party. Saturday afternoon there is a horse riding excursion I actually went to sign him up for a full hour early so he would be guaranteed one of 30 spots. Sunday we've planned to watch a movie called Furry Vengeance.

So what do I do? Pick one to miss is my first instinct. Or all of them. I don't know. The horse thing will make my deposit go away, and I may be black-listed from future events. Missing the closing day for t-ball would be the least terrible in MY opinion. Not for T; missing the closing day ceremonies would be devastating. And the movie... I could take it or leave it.

It was suggested I wait and see how he does tomorrow. I might do that. We'll see.

I just hope we don't get stuck here.