Fear and Paranoia

Today I got a funky vibe from T. I was just a bit blah with him, and he was a bit blah with me.

I dropped him off at school like I usually do, which involves me hanging out until Mrs. D comes to walk them to class. As he's about to go to class, T turns to me and says "Mom, I feel like I am going to have a bad day."

Immediately I go into the platitude of "if you say you're going to have a bad day, you will have a bad day, but if you say you will have a good day, then you will have a good day" and give him a little butt slap and off he goes.

On a few days of the week, I get a ride to the Kroc Center from Mommy A (I live up the hill from there, though I tell you that walking up-hill 3/4 of a mile isn't my idea of a pleasant way to start the day). I followed her to her car as usual, and sat in the seat. I had the seat belt in my hand. I moved my purse and began to move the clip toward the buckle.

Suddenly, I was gripped with anxiety. Holy crap, was my son trying to tell me something? Did he know he wasn't in a good head space? Was he maybe sick and didn't really know how to express it other than using the label of thinking he's going to be bad?

"I can't leave," I tell Mommy A. She looked at me, waiting for explanation. "T was telling me he was not going to have a good day. I can't leave him here. I need to go get him."

"Are you sure," she asks, giving me time to think it over.

"Yes, I need to go." I hopped out and walked back to the school. On my way to the office to check him out, I ran into JM, a one of T's classmates' mom.

"Are you staying at school today?" JM was coming out as I was going in.

"No, T told me he's going to have a bad day and I am going to get him."

"Why are you going to take him out? He seemed fine just now when I dropped A off."

"I don't know. I don't know what to do." I fidgeted nervously, unsure and not doomed to taking the bus home.

"Don't take him out, he's fine," JM told me.

"Can I ask you something, and you can totally say no? Can I stay at your house (she lives across the street from the school) for a few hours, just in case?"

"Of course you can!" she assured me. So I turned around and followed her home.

I spent the rest of the day hanging out with her. We folded some of her baby's laundry, went shopping for a birthday party, got some prints at Target, picked up her WIC from Albertsons, and just hung out watching tv for a while.

Daddy B, thankfully, called to say he was on his way home from work.

And lo and behold, T had a good day! I am SOOO happy! We took him, RJ and M to the rock wall for an hour and a half and just let them climb and run around until they were dirty and sticky. Mommy A picked up her two, and we all went to our homes.

Tomorrow is Tuesday, and I will be spending the day at T's school, as I usually do on Tuesdays. It's the last Tuesday of the school year, so that will be nice.

Oh that reminds me, I need to call and check on his school transfer.